The only thing was Paige didn't want to be a good wife and mother anymore. She wanted to be free, free to be herself. She wanted to be the Paige that still went to concerts and on random road trips. To go to a bar, and dance all night with whomever she wanted. Maybe even take someone home if she had the urge. PTA's and Church bake sales were wonderful, but she needed more. "Are you going to let my dinner burn or are you going to pay attention to it?" her husband said, snapping her back to reality. She smiled and took the pan off the stove. Dinner went the way it always went. Everyone grabbed the food and filled their plates. The dog kept barking again and again to convince her husband to give him food. Her husband yelled at the six year old because he played with his food. The whole time, the twins never stopped talking. Paige sat staring at her plate of untouched food, while everyone was talking loudly and nobody was listening. She felt like she was drowning, like she had lost. Michael loved snow-skiing, as did I.As it happened we had both been to many of thesame resorts and we were able to discuss the relative merits.He thought that I was a very brave girl skiing some ofthe more difficult runs. We had both also travelledextensively but felt that the British Isles weredefinitely the best place to live despite and possiblybecause of the rainy weather. After lunch, which we atetogether, we agreed to meet the following day, as I had anappointment to see the shrink. I told him I was going foranother check-up.Karl was a tall man, a bit older than myself and althoughI had a distrust of all things psychiatric I felt that maybehe could help me in some way to find myself. I answered hisquestions as honestly as I could although quite often I wasnot sure of the answers. He asked me if I had ever had anyhomosexual tendencies to which I replied "no". I thentold him about the joke with Michael and how it wasbeginning to take a more serious turn for me. Heasked.
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